Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Overalls and a Ditch Cow

Apparently overalls are 'trending' now.

 

I have ZERO plans to buy overalls.

Mostly because of this:


Striped overalls?
Check.

Blue eyeshadow?
Check.

Poofy hair with a hair bow?
Check check!


In 1987 I rocked these overalls like a total boss, as you can clearly witness by the above photos.

My friends and I also sometimes rocked them like this:


Belted.
Rolled up.

Pure awesomeness.

Don't think for a moment that adding high heels entitles you to wear overalls on a runway.
Or anywhere in public outside the home you are currently painting.
Or the farm you are plowing.

Because those are really the only acceptable times overalls can be worn.

Unless you're a pregnant hillbilly man.
Drinking a margarita.
And smiling.


 Since we're on the subject of hillbillies and such...

On Monday I spent the day at Lake Whitney which is deep in the heart of a place in Texas where it's perfectly acceptable to wear overalls outside the house.

Because there's a lot of farmland.

And roadkill.

Mostly it's your typical garden variety roadkill like skunks, possums, armadillos, and some deer thrown in occasionally, too, which are really gross because they are large.

Those usually end up in ditches on the side of the road waiting for someone official to pick them up.
Because it's illegal to take a deer you hit with your car even if it's dead.

Anyway, I'm driving to Lake Whitney when all of a sudden I see an animal in the ditch on the side of the road.

AND IT WAS A FREAKING COW!

like this one only it was upside down!

I have lived in Texas my entire life and have passed probably a million bazillion farms with cows and have never in my entire life seen a dead cow in a ditch!

Ever.

So then I started wondering how they were going to get that thing out of the ditch because it was enormous!

And then I also started thinking that his owner was probably going to be really upset because that's a lot of steak and hamburgers.

Someone really should have told that cow to MOOOOOOVE!



À la vie et à l'amour
-Cortney


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